A Fairytale Room
by Emmatrix
Summary: While the rest of the Storybrooke town folk are sleeping away, the Charmings, Imps, and The Evil Queen are busy on the net... Take a peek and find for yourself what's the latest from the bigshots of Once Upon a Time. And what has gotten into Emma Swan? Has Mayor Mills been on her mind? -SwanQueen Rated M for safety.


**Hey, Emmatrix here with my first fanfic. Obviously I love ABC's Once Upon A Time... ;) I am most definitely a SwanQueen fan. Those two characters have incredible chemistry and I sorta kinda well yeah am definitely hoping the writers will go with an alternative groove for this show. Be warned... there is only a short portion of mild "cyber-get it on" in the following chatroom. Rated N for Naughty... Enjoy!**

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**FAIRYTALE CHATROOM**

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**Madame Majesty** has entered the Fairytale at 8:15 p.m..

**SpinMeRound** has entered the Fairytale at 8:17 p.m.

**Madame Majesty:** Well, well SpinMe, I didn't expect you to arrive so early...

**SpinMeRound:** I have an appointment, Majesty. And you know I like to be on time for my appointments...

**Madame Majesty:** An appointment with the town dentist, perhaps? Poor Beautylace surely recoils when kissing your caveties.

**SpinMeRound:** Madame Majesty, Beautylace loves everything about me, even my beastly fangs.

**MadameMajesty:** I can't think of a stranger subject to disgust, oops... I MEAN discuss. :)

**SpinMeRound: ** I can. Mirror mirror, on the wall... Who's the fairest of them all?

**MadameMajesty:** That's getting old Spin. :((

**SpinMeRound**: Not as old as you.

**MadameMajesty:** Watch it, you're the old fart here. :(((

**SpinMeRound:** My, my Majesty, feeling a tad childish in our taunts tonight? Or are your rotten apples giving you gas again?

**PrincessCharming** has entered the Fairytale at 8:22 p.m.

**PrincessCharming:** Well this is awkward... Rotten apples? Gas? Madame Majesty is there something I should know?

**Madame Majesty:** Hello Princess.

**SpinMeRound:** Welcome and good evening Princess. You break curses. Can you cure her Majesty's curse of bloated bowels?

**PrincessCharming:** Well... they don't call me the product of true love for nothin... Madame May—uH...Majesty, need me to ride my royal steed over to your place after a quickstop to the Pharmacy? It's on me... And by the way, I like them apples.

**Madame Majesty: ** Pardon me, Princess? O_O

**PrincessCharming:** Yeah, I know... The phrase is ancient, cheesy, and corny. ;)

**Madame Majesty: **...

**LipsBloodRed** has entered the Fairytale at 8:40 p.m.

**LipsBloodRed:** PrincessCharming what the hell? :( Go to your room. Wait till I tell your father!

**PrincessCharming:** Sorry Lips. No banishing to the room. Gotta stack of paperwork tonight. So I'll be stayin late at the office.

**LipsBloodRed:** Then get out of chat and finish your work!

**PrincessCharming:** Seriously? Are you trying to tell me what to do again?

**Madame Majesty:** Tsk Tsk Lips, must you punish your ADULT daughter for paying me a compliment? (batting eye-lashes) **To PrincessCharming ** I'm baking my infamous apple pie tonight. It's in the oven as we type. Perhaps you'd like a nice warm slice after you gallop over here and drop off my magic gas pill. :D

**SpinMeRound: ** Don't be tempted Princess... Remember, her Majesty's apples are rotten!

**Madame Majesty:** Shut it, Rump Roast.

**PrincessCharming: ** LMAO... Don't know bout that, Majesty. It seems Lips and Daddy dearest will give me a spankin' if I go anywhere near your apple pie.

**ShepherdDaddy** has entered the Fairytale at 8:43 p.m.

**ShepherdDaddy:** No, no spankings. You'll just be grounded for eternity Charming girl.

**SpinMeRound:** Is there a family reunion scheduled in here tonight?

**Baelfire** has entered the Fairytale at 8:45 p.m.

**Baelfire:** I dunno papa, you tell us.

**SpinMeRound:** Bae, change your handle. Discretion is advised. At least I hope that this time everyone will be discreet!

**Baelfire:** Okay. Brb papa...

**Baelfire** has left the room.

**PrincessCharming:** Hey Majesty, gotta curse for overbearing parents who happen to disturbingly be the same AGE as me? ;)

**Madame Majesty:** Well lets see... I have a talent when it comes to crushing hearts... Will that do?

**PrincessCharming:** Gosh! I didn't say I wanted em dead!

**Madame Majesty: ** Forgive me Princess. :)

**SonoftheDarkOne** has entered the Fairytale at 8:47 p.m.

**PrincessCharming:** Well that's certainly subtle, Sonofthedarkone! Oh by the way your majesty... forgiveness given. I was just messin with you anyway.

**Madame Majesty:** I know Princess. ;)

**SpinMeRound: To SonoftheDarkOne ** My boy, that's not discrete either.

**SonoftheDarkOne: ** I thought you would be proud of my charming wit, papa. ;) We both enjoy being wise-asses here and there!

**SpinMeRound:** **SIGH**

**Madame Majesty:** Don't you mean "Rumple-wit"? Charming is already taken by someone in here. LOL.

**PrincessCharming: ** Damn straight.

**Madame Majesty:** Are you sure dear?

**PrincessCharming:** ...

**SonoftheDarkOne** has left the room.

**Madame Majesty: ** I asked are you sure? PrincessCharming, hello? :/

**PrincessCharming** has left the room.

**Madame Majesty:** Damn.

**LipsBloodRed: ** That's my girl. I don't like what you're implying about my daughter, Ms. Majesty! :(

**Madame Majesty: ** Oh really, Lips? And pray tell what am I implying? :P

**ShepherdDaddy: To LipsBloodRed** It doesn't matter honey. The sheriff is obviously back to her work. Let's get some rest. You've got a fundraiser for the kids tomorrow.

**LipsBloodRed:** You're right, we should turn in early. (staring daggers at Madame Majesty) :/

**DoitLikeaDude** has entered the Fairytale at 8:56 p.m. **ShepherdDaddy** has left the room.

**LipsBloodRed: ** DoitLikeaDude? Are you new here?

**DoitLikeaDude: ** Nope. I can do it like a brotha, do it like a dude! Grab my crotch, wear my hat low like you!

**Madame Majesty:** LMSAO...I'm loving this.

**SpinMeRound:** You would.

**LipsBloodRed:** …...I'm left speechless. O_O

**DoitLikeaDude: ** Majesty, was that a typo? The LMSAO?

**LipsBloodRed** has left the room.

**Madame Majesty:** It's difficult to keep these long fingernails from slipping to the S key at times, why?... are you secretly watching my every move?

**DoitLikeaDude: ** Indeed I am. And please, don't Laugh your "Shapely" Ass Off... It provides sexy entertainment for us bored Storybrook town citizens when ALL OF IT shapely moves from side to side in sync with the steps of your stillettos.

**Madame Majesty: ** I take it you are a Storybrook citizen and that you take pleasure in observing me Dude? You also surprisingly understand the meaning of alliteration which means you must have a G.E.D. level of education at the least... Hold on a second while I attempt to close my dropped jaw.

**DoitLikeaDude:** Hold on to what?

**Madame Majesty:** To my shapely ass of course, dear... :))

**DoItLikeaDude: ** Of course... with both of my hands.

**Madame Majesty: ** I guess now you won't be able to type to me with your hands filled, Dude.

**SpinMeRound:** Need I remind you Majesty and "mysterious" Dude, that I don't allow cyber-sex in my Chatroom?

**DoItLikeaDude:** Holy shit! We were not having cyber-sex...

**Madame Majesty:** C'mon...***licks lips**... show me how you "do it like a dude", Dude. :0

**DoItLikeaDude: ** Madame Majesty, if you don't stop licking those lips...

**SpinMeRound:** To hell with my appointment... Now if you will pardon me Princess and Majesty, I will leave you two to your steamy chat.

**DoItLikeaDude:** C'mon, seriously... Am I that transparent, Gold? **:'**(

**Madame Majesty: ** Indeed Sheriff... Perhaps I should lock you in your jail cell for a bit as a punishment for sexually harassing me... :)

**DoItLikeaDude:** Perhaps, but will you be sitting in that same jail cell? On my lap... straddling me with those lengthy long legs...panting for sweet air as my hands roam beneath your tight pencil skirt, feeling you up and frisking your thighs... I dip my tongue between your lips... lips that whisper and beg me for more and more.

**Madame Majesty:** Mmmmmmmmmm...mmmmm... Princess! ... Dude-Sheriff or whatever... YOU are hot! 3

**DoItLikeaDude: **Madame Mayor you can call me whatever!

**SpinMeRound:** **SIGH** Please Sheriff, remember to use protection.

**DoItLikeaDude:** WTF? Gold, last time I checked there was uh definite zero weenage hanging between my legs... Did I just type "weenage?" O_O

**Madame Majesty: ** Well Ms. Swan, you've had us all fooled. :P And right now I doubt your weenage is just hanging. ***wink**

**SpinMeRound:** Will the two of you get your minds out of the gutter? I meant a protection spell, Emma. Your magic is powerful and unbridled. If you have a romp with the queen there could be explosions!

**DoItLikeaDude:** ** *raised eyebrow** ..._Explosions_, Mr. Gold? Somehow I feel even more encouraged! LMAO :)))

**Madame Majesty:** LMSAO - Mua ha ha ha! It would seem that you and I are finally on the same page, Ms. Swan. :) Buy a box of Trojan...horses when you stop by the Pharmacy dear, so that we don't have any... accidents riding the saddle. :D Isn't that right, Rumple?

**SpinMeRound:** **SIGH** I am closing this chatroom tonight. Ladies feel free to roam about the _Adult Friend Finder_ chatrooms and get to know each other better there, not in here.

**DoItLikeaDude: ** But wait! I-

**FAIRTYTALE CHATROOM CLOSED**

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**Hope that was fun! Reviews by all welcomed. I do not claim the show Once Upon a Time, or any of its characters. Those claims are with ABC Studios and the show's writers. Let me know if you want this continued. I was thinking of writing a story as a sequel to this chat, but I could always continue with the chatroom setting...  
**


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